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- Becoming a parent comes with physical changes for mom and dad.
- Society's youthful and idealised beauty standards can leave both parents feeling vulnerable and self-conscious.
- Below, we share a few tips for overcoming mom and dad bod inadequacy.
Before you become a parent, all you hear about is how it can be one of life's most transformative experiences, and it can still be a pretty surreal experience to live through, even though you kind of know what to expect.
Bringing a tiny stranger home impacts every part of your life, even something as personal as your relationship with your body.
In a society that often emphasises youthful and idealised beauty standards, the physical changes accompanying parenthood can leave both parents feeling vulnerable and self-conscious.
For women, the journey into motherhood brings about a myriad of physical changes.
Your abdominal muscles stretch, your skin expands, and your breasts undergo significant changes in preparation for breastfeeding.
According to Vital Baby, experiencing dissatisfaction with your body during pregnancy can have significant implications for both maternal and foetal wellbeing, leading some women to adopt extreme dietary restrictions or even trigger a relapse of an existing eating disorder.
The pressure to bounce back to pre-pregnancy bodies (popularly known as snapback culture) is a societal expectation that can contribute to feelings of inadequacy, affecting women's self-esteem and confidence in social settings.
Vital Baby advises:
Focus on nourishing your body with wholesome foods and staying active—your wellbeing matters.
During this time, you should prioritise your well-being rather than focusing on attaining a specific appearance.
Weight gain, stretch marks, and loose skin are natural parts of pregnancy, just as ageing is a natural part of life.
And moms don't experience this in isolation.
While men do not experience the physical toll of pregnancy, fatherhood does leave its mark on their bodies. Stress, sleepless nights, and lifestyle changes can lead to weight gain, increased stress levels, and even changes in hormonal balance. Society often overlooks this shift, perpetuating the societal myth that only women undergo physical changes as parents.
READ | IN PICS: Moms are hitting back at the 'bounce back' culture
Last September, 27-year-old rapper Nasty C (real name Nsikayesizwe David Junior Ngcobo) celebrated his dad bod after becoming a father to a boy he named Oliver.
"Hi, my name is Nasty C, and I'm a new dad. This is my dad bod, and I love it. I love myself, and I'm happy. I look great; I'm a strong black man, a strong father. This doesn't make me insecure at all. In fact, it makes me very confident," he said before smirking and cutting the video.
These bodily changes can also happen to people who have not experienced childbirth or biological fatherhood, as they may still undergo body transformations related to parenthood.
The shared responsibilities of raising a child, such as altered sleep patterns and lifestyle adjustments, can impact anyone involved in parenting, regardless of biological ties.
If you feel inadequate, it can help to:
- Shift your mindset from aesthetics to functionality. Marvel at how your body is preparing to grow and deliver a new life into the world.
- Share your feelings with a trusted friend, partner, or family member. Talking openly can help lighten your mental load.
- Take the time to honour yourself by appreciating your body's strength, endurance, and resilience during pregnancy, childbirth and the transition into parenthood.
- See it as an invitation to educate yourself and learn about the changes your body or your birthing partner's body will undergo during pregnancy and postpartum so you can balance and support your mind and body better.
- Create a pregnancy mantra or positive phrase. Repeat it regularly, especially when feeling low, and practise better self-talk.
The last piece of the puzzle is community. Connecting with other parents and joining support groups and online communities can provide a touch point for what is expected so that you can figure out when to ask for help, which can help you feel less alone.
- Information supplied by Freebees PR & Marketing on behalf of Vital Baby SA.
