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It seems the old Frank Sintra tune "Love and Marriage" should have added "sleep" somewhere in the chorus because according to our Parent24 readers, it's getting enough shut-eye that makes life as a parent and spouse work efficiently.
We recently published "A sleep divorce is the norm for 40% of couples" and got some great responses from our readers.
For some, sleeping in separate beds or even rooms was just what the doctor ordered, sex life and all.
Others admit that while sleeping in separate beds proved good for getting enough zzz's, their intimacy has suffered.
Here's what they had to say:
Do you and your partner sleep in separate beds/rooms? How has the arrangement affected your relationship overall? Tell us by emailing to chatback@parent24.com and we could publish your letter. Do let us know if you'd like to stay anonymous.
"Has it affected our marriage? Absolutely – for the better!"
"It was great to read the article about sleep deprivation affecting some 40% of couples. My wife and I both snore and some years ago we both made the decision to sleep in separate bedrooms.
"This has massively enhanced our sleeping patterns. It was an embarrassing thing to admit at first but I have gradually become more comfortable about revealing that we sleep apart.
"Has it affected our marriage? Absolutely – for the better! I no longer have to worry about disturbing my wife if I need to get up to visit the loo in the middle of the night, and she can read late with the light on (which used to keep me awake before).
"Has it affected our sex life? Not at all. Improved it if anything. Yes, I do miss the closeness of cuddling together, but the benefits of separate sleeping quarters have far outweighed any loss.
"So my advice to people who are battling with their partner snoring is – take the plunge and sleep separately. It works!"
– Anonymous hubby
"I'm happy apart"
"My ex snored like a 900kW chainsaw without a silencer"
"When I was married (now divorced for 15 years) I had a torrid time at night.
"My ex snored like a 900kW chainsaw without a silencer. I, on the other hand, have struggled with insomnia from my high school days – needless to say, she fell asleep instantly and I struggled (still do) to get to sleep.
"I and my current partner sleep in separate beds in separate rooms. Yes, the intimacy isn't the same – but what the hell? We don't need to be joined at the pelvis or hips."
– Brian
"We had a sleep divorce"
"I do not want to sleep in another room because I would miss being next to him too much"
"I absolutely and truly adore and love my husband. But as night-time creeps in, I want to creep out of our bed. His snoring is driving me crazy and he cannot fall asleep without the TV on.
"Once asleep, I have to get out of bed to get hold of the remote and switch the TV off. He snores so loudly that we can hear him three bedrooms further!
"I do not want to sleep in another room because I would miss being next to him too much. Life is too short so I just live with it. But yes it is very bad!"
Do you and your partner sleep in separate beds/rooms? How has the arrangement affected your relationship overall? Tell us by emailing to chatback@parent24.com and we could publish your letter. Do let us know if you'd like to stay anonymous.
Read more:
- Is it a good idea to share a bed with your child?
- Children and sleep: How much do they really need?
- 5 sleep secrets for new moms and dads
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